+JMJ+
I've lost count as to what day of Lent we are on...I'll recalculate later today.
The battle is full on against HB 2354. Teams are canvasing several districts as I type, educating constituents about the threat HB 2354 is to Illinois.
I'm about to leave my favorite Chicago coffee shop to go on a long walk before I get back to graphic design work.
Just want to say it is a beautiful day...and beg you to pray for a renewal of our society. Seriously, if the Catholic Education System had not been failing to form men and women to be faithful Catholics for the past 40-50 years, we wouldn't be dealing with HB 2354, because it would not exist...because no Faithful Catholic would have sponsored the bill...
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Thursday, March 19, 2009
More on HB 2354...
The pro-abortion faction continues to push their agenda in the Illinois General Assembly. HB 2354 is currently under consideration by the Illinois House of Representatives (after passing out of committee last week) which would effectively make abortion a fundamental right in Illinois--and thus set a precedent for other states to follow.
Activists are fighting this atrocious "Illinois FOCA" Bill on the ground right now, organizing the grass-roots and responding to the immediate needs that can prevent HB 2354 from becoming Illinois Law.
A coalition of Pro Life Organizations and Activists in Illinois has a website--www.StopIllinoisFOCA.
What is the REAL stinger here?? Several "Republicans" are SPONSORING or SUPPORTING THIS BILL! Personal PAC, Illinois' extremely wealthy pro-abortion PAC, has been throwing their weight around to get this bill through, with the encouragement of Planned Parenthood and the ACLU. Even more sickening--several "Catholics" are co-sponsoring this bill, including the main bill sponsor, Barbara Flynn Currie.
This story is begging for National Media Attention...otherwise, abortion may very well become a fundamental right in Illinois.
I was down in Springfield again on 03/17/09. The Chamber was speckled with green as State Reps celebrated St. Patrick's day. It was a tough day to lobby, because much of the day the reps were in Chamber. I was really edified by the group of young adults that convened to lobby against HB 2354. Although we had unfavorable circumstances (i.e. not being able to meet reps in their offices), people persevered and really stuck their necks out. The ACLU was there lobbying folks all day, too--as I imagine the abortion lobby is there daily twisting the truth about HB 2354.
There is a comment (that I haven't posted yet) to a previous blog post accusing me of misrepresenting the comprehensive sex ed component of HB 2354. I am going to allow that comment to be posted once I can give you the citations to disprove the anonomous commentors claims. Too bad anonymous doesn't know that part of my job is to know what I'm talking about when it comes to sex ed, as I do human sexuality education for the Catholic Church in one of the largest and most diverse dioceses in the country. SIECUS is a disaster...and I can prove it...that stuff will be posted soon.
Please get the word out about HB 2354, "Illinois FOCA"...by God's grace it will be defeated.
Friday, March 13, 2009
FIGHT ILLINOIS FOCA
+JMJ+
It boggles my mind how Illinois is facing its most crucial legislative battle and NOBODY is talking about it.
I've been eating, breathing and sleeping (well, not really sleeping these past few days) HB 2354, the so-called Reproductive Health and Access Act. This is essentially Illinois' "FOCA." Yeah...accept, it could very well be worse than any Federal FOCA.
Check out this website for more info on the bill, and also the highly successful petition against HB 2354. We are over 2,500 signatures in 2 weeks!!
I never thought my life would be marked by weekly visits to Springfield, but so it has ever since March rolled around! On Wednesday 03/11, just 2 days ago, I was an official witness at the Human Services Committee Hearing, during which HB 2354 was voted for, 5-2, despite excellent testimony from leaders in the pro-life movement.
I was so irritated by the ACLU and Planned Parenthood...Barbara Flynn Currie, the bill sponsor (a "Catholic", by the way), was very articulate as she parroted what the ACLU attorney whispered in her ear during the hearing, in response to her colleague's questions. If you aren't familiar with how such a hearing works on the state-level, essentially, the bill sponsor replies to any questions from committee members regarding the bill. Those testifying (both for and against the bill), cannot reply, even if the bill sponsor's information is incorrect or misleading.
HB 2354 boils my blood on so many levels. What horrifies me most, though, is how misinformed OUR STATE REPRESENTATIVES ARE regarding this bill! Every Rep I visited on Wednesday either had not even looked at the bill, or was not aware of the provisions and how far reaching they are--they are learning about HB 2354 through PP, Personal PAC, Currie and her cronies, NOT from the ACTUAL TEXT OF THE BILL.
Whether you are pro-choice or pro-life, you don't want this bill to go through. Among other things, it would:
1) De-regulate abortion: abortion would become a fundamental right, and laws such as Parental Notification or the Ban on Partial Birth Abortion or the Infant Born Alive Protection Act would be null and void
2) Increases TAX PAYER FUNDING of abortion. Illinois has the worse deficit of any state in the union. Are you telling me we should be funding abortions with our VERY limited resources??
3) This bill grants IMMUNITY to abortion doctors if they happen to harm a woman during the procedure, as long as they act in "good faith" (actual text from the bill). So, who defines good faith?
4) Comprehensive sex ed for public schools: We are talking K-12, people. The state decides what is age-appropriate...and I've seen the document that the curricula would be based upon. All I have to say is, if you are a parent, start writing your requests for exemption from sex ed (unless you are o.k. with your 5 year old learning about masturbation).
5) Rights of Conscious: GONE. That is right. Catholic hospitals and health care systems would be forced to cooperate with abortion, or SHUT DOWN. Physicians could be forced to perform abortions...and pharmacists to distribute emergency contraception...it may even impact the counseling done at Catholic Charities--imagine if Catholic Charities were forced to refer for abortions???
DO YOU SEE HOW SERIOUS THIS IS??
This is NOT just Illinois' problem, either. If this thing passes in Illinois, watch out, cause YOUR STATE IS NEXT!
We need all the PRAYERS we can get for the defeat of HB 2354. We need this story to hit the national media. People NEED TO KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON. The language of this bill goes against what 86% of Americans want: some sort of tangible restrictions on abortion.
This bill is all about abortion, unfettered!
If you are able to help us in Illinois, please let me know. Pray, pray, pray! Check out my Twitter account for more regular, live updates (Lilies159). God bless!
It boggles my mind how Illinois is facing its most crucial legislative battle and NOBODY is talking about it.
I've been eating, breathing and sleeping (well, not really sleeping these past few days) HB 2354, the so-called Reproductive Health and Access Act. This is essentially Illinois' "FOCA." Yeah...accept, it could very well be worse than any Federal FOCA.
Check out this website for more info on the bill, and also the highly successful petition against HB 2354. We are over 2,500 signatures in 2 weeks!!
I never thought my life would be marked by weekly visits to Springfield, but so it has ever since March rolled around! On Wednesday 03/11, just 2 days ago, I was an official witness at the Human Services Committee Hearing, during which HB 2354 was voted for, 5-2, despite excellent testimony from leaders in the pro-life movement.
I was so irritated by the ACLU and Planned Parenthood...Barbara Flynn Currie, the bill sponsor (a "Catholic", by the way), was very articulate as she parroted what the ACLU attorney whispered in her ear during the hearing, in response to her colleague's questions. If you aren't familiar with how such a hearing works on the state-level, essentially, the bill sponsor replies to any questions from committee members regarding the bill. Those testifying (both for and against the bill), cannot reply, even if the bill sponsor's information is incorrect or misleading.
HB 2354 boils my blood on so many levels. What horrifies me most, though, is how misinformed OUR STATE REPRESENTATIVES ARE regarding this bill! Every Rep I visited on Wednesday either had not even looked at the bill, or was not aware of the provisions and how far reaching they are--they are learning about HB 2354 through PP, Personal PAC, Currie and her cronies, NOT from the ACTUAL TEXT OF THE BILL.
Whether you are pro-choice or pro-life, you don't want this bill to go through. Among other things, it would:
1) De-regulate abortion: abortion would become a fundamental right, and laws such as Parental Notification or the Ban on Partial Birth Abortion or the Infant Born Alive Protection Act would be null and void
2) Increases TAX PAYER FUNDING of abortion. Illinois has the worse deficit of any state in the union. Are you telling me we should be funding abortions with our VERY limited resources??
3) This bill grants IMMUNITY to abortion doctors if they happen to harm a woman during the procedure, as long as they act in "good faith" (actual text from the bill). So, who defines good faith?
4) Comprehensive sex ed for public schools: We are talking K-12, people. The state decides what is age-appropriate...and I've seen the document that the curricula would be based upon. All I have to say is, if you are a parent, start writing your requests for exemption from sex ed (unless you are o.k. with your 5 year old learning about masturbation).
5) Rights of Conscious: GONE. That is right. Catholic hospitals and health care systems would be forced to cooperate with abortion, or SHUT DOWN. Physicians could be forced to perform abortions...and pharmacists to distribute emergency contraception...it may even impact the counseling done at Catholic Charities--imagine if Catholic Charities were forced to refer for abortions???
DO YOU SEE HOW SERIOUS THIS IS??
This is NOT just Illinois' problem, either. If this thing passes in Illinois, watch out, cause YOUR STATE IS NEXT!
We need all the PRAYERS we can get for the defeat of HB 2354. We need this story to hit the national media. People NEED TO KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON. The language of this bill goes against what 86% of Americans want: some sort of tangible restrictions on abortion.
This bill is all about abortion, unfettered!
If you are able to help us in Illinois, please let me know. Pray, pray, pray! Check out my Twitter account for more regular, live updates (Lilies159). God bless!
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
DEFEAT HB 2354: IL STATE FOCA
+JMJ+
Lent 2009: Day 13
Yes, I know it is slang, but I mean YOU. If you live or attend university in Illinois, I desperately need you to sign THIS PETITION. HB 2354, the so-called "Reproductive Health and Access Act" will be HEARD IN COMMITTEE TOMORROW at 8:00 a.m.
Maybe you've already heard me talking about HB 2354--but NOW is the time to take action. I mean it. Sign the petition. We are about 50 signatures away from 2,000 in less than 2 weeks! That is awesome!!!
Why am I so focused on this? Because this is a MISERABLE piece of legislation. It will enshrine abortion in the state of Illinois...and also mandate HORRENDOUS comprehensive sex ed for grades K-12. Just in case you are wondering how comprehensive that is, let me be a little crude. They want to teach 5 year olds how to masturbate. I kid you not.
Check out my blog post below, which also deals with HB 2354. If you are in Illinois and have not yet contacted your Representative, DO IT NOW! You can find thier contact info here.
This is a crucial time in the State of Illinois. If this legislation makes it out of committee and onto the House Floor, we need EVERYONE to lobby thier reps. Just like federal "FOCA" Legislation, HB 2354 is just radical.
Even if you are pro-choice, you don't want this bill to go through. It de-regulates abortion, removes rights of conscious for physicians and pharmacists, and protects abortion providers from any malpractice lawsuit...essentially freeing them from responsibility for any injury caused a woman during the abortion procedure. The list goes on...and on...and on...I challenge you to read the bill HERE and be honest with yourself. Do you think this is a well-written piece of legislation? I THINK NOT.
Send up the prayers, please! May God's will be done...we are leaving for Springfield in a few minutes. Please pray for my boss Mary-Louise (Director of the Respect Life Office), Clark (from Americans United for Life) and all who will be testifying against this bill!
Huge props to Students for Life of Illinois for circulating the highly successful petition. Please SIGN IT if you are in Illinois!
Lent 2009: Day 13
Yes, I know it is slang, but I mean YOU. If you live or attend university in Illinois, I desperately need you to sign THIS PETITION. HB 2354, the so-called "Reproductive Health and Access Act" will be HEARD IN COMMITTEE TOMORROW at 8:00 a.m.
Maybe you've already heard me talking about HB 2354--but NOW is the time to take action. I mean it. Sign the petition. We are about 50 signatures away from 2,000 in less than 2 weeks! That is awesome!!!
Why am I so focused on this? Because this is a MISERABLE piece of legislation. It will enshrine abortion in the state of Illinois...and also mandate HORRENDOUS comprehensive sex ed for grades K-12. Just in case you are wondering how comprehensive that is, let me be a little crude. They want to teach 5 year olds how to masturbate. I kid you not.
Check out my blog post below, which also deals with HB 2354. If you are in Illinois and have not yet contacted your Representative, DO IT NOW! You can find thier contact info here.
This is a crucial time in the State of Illinois. If this legislation makes it out of committee and onto the House Floor, we need EVERYONE to lobby thier reps. Just like federal "FOCA" Legislation, HB 2354 is just radical.
Even if you are pro-choice, you don't want this bill to go through. It de-regulates abortion, removes rights of conscious for physicians and pharmacists, and protects abortion providers from any malpractice lawsuit...essentially freeing them from responsibility for any injury caused a woman during the abortion procedure. The list goes on...and on...and on...I challenge you to read the bill HERE and be honest with yourself. Do you think this is a well-written piece of legislation? I THINK NOT.
Send up the prayers, please! May God's will be done...we are leaving for Springfield in a few minutes. Please pray for my boss Mary-Louise (Director of the Respect Life Office), Clark (from Americans United for Life) and all who will be testifying against this bill!
Huge props to Students for Life of Illinois for circulating the highly successful petition. Please SIGN IT if you are in Illinois!
Monday, March 9, 2009
IL FOCA: BEWARE!!
+JMJ+
Oh my Heavens! This country is going crazy. Pres. Obama just signed an Exec Order that would fund embryonic stem cell research--which is not only morally wrong, but BAD POLICY AND BAD SCIENCE...
In other news, if you are in Illinois, WE NEED YOUR HELP!!
HB 2354, the so-called Reproductive Health and Access Act (a.k.a. the IL State FOCA) was not heard in committee last Wednesday (I was down in Springfield lobbying against the bill on that day)...
We have taken to calling it the state FOCA for all of the bad it seeks to do: prohibit regulation of abortion; publicly fund abortion; undermine the Health Care Right of Conscience Act, provide broad immunity protections to any health care worked involved in abortion, and mandate comprehensive sex education in all public schools. In short, it is a poorly written, terrible peice of legislation.
We do expect the bill to come up for a vote this week. It will probably be heard Wednesday morning in the House Human Services Committee, around 8:00 a.m. This is a tough committee for us, and we need all the calls/lobbying we can muster to keep it from getting to the House Floor!!
We need the following two members of the committee to vote NO on House Bill 2354:
Representative Mary Flowers
District office: 773-471-5200
Springfield office: 217-782-4207
Representative Sandy Cole
District office: 847-543-0062
Springfield office: 217-782-7320
Call these representatives and ask them to vote No on House Bill 2354 because it would prevent any regulation of abortion, provide for public funding of abortion, force health care workers to abandon their consciences or lose their job, and mandate comprehensive sex education.
+++++++
NOW is the time to unite our voices for the Culture of Life. The enemy is on the prowl, trying to enshrine abortion and other anti-life measures in our country. We must act NOW before it is TOO LATE!
Oh my Heavens! This country is going crazy. Pres. Obama just signed an Exec Order that would fund embryonic stem cell research--which is not only morally wrong, but BAD POLICY AND BAD SCIENCE...
In other news, if you are in Illinois, WE NEED YOUR HELP!!
HB 2354, the so-called Reproductive Health and Access Act (a.k.a. the IL State FOCA) was not heard in committee last Wednesday (I was down in Springfield lobbying against the bill on that day)...
We have taken to calling it the state FOCA for all of the bad it seeks to do: prohibit regulation of abortion; publicly fund abortion; undermine the Health Care Right of Conscience Act, provide broad immunity protections to any health care worked involved in abortion, and mandate comprehensive sex education in all public schools. In short, it is a poorly written, terrible peice of legislation.
We do expect the bill to come up for a vote this week. It will probably be heard Wednesday morning in the House Human Services Committee, around 8:00 a.m. This is a tough committee for us, and we need all the calls/lobbying we can muster to keep it from getting to the House Floor!!
We need the following two members of the committee to vote NO on House Bill 2354:
Representative Mary Flowers
District office: 773-471-5200
Springfield office: 217-782-4207
Representative Sandy Cole
District office: 847-543-0062
Springfield office: 217-782-7320
Call these representatives and ask them to vote No on House Bill 2354 because it would prevent any regulation of abortion, provide for public funding of abortion, force health care workers to abandon their consciences or lose their job, and mandate comprehensive sex education.
+++++++
NOW is the time to unite our voices for the Culture of Life. The enemy is on the prowl, trying to enshrine abortion and other anti-life measures in our country. We must act NOW before it is TOO LATE!
Sunday, March 8, 2009
Noble Contradiction
+JMJ+
Lent 2009: Day 12
It seems things are congealing...in ways I never imagined. I've been poking around all my 'vocation stuff' and found this essay I submitted to a contest last year. Let me know what you think; I never heard back from the publisher.
+++++++
For thousands of years, people like Aquinas and Augustine have eloquently made a case for God. There is something to be said for words--they inspire and instruct, and at times deeply influence society. Yet, today words cannot win the case for God--only a choice to live a case for God will hold in the court of popular culture. I'll admit that this is not easy choice to make. As a 20-something, I've been told all my life that I can do anything, go anywhere, be whatever I want. So, what would motivate me to live a life that could point to God?
I've seen the fruit of freedom and relativism first hand. I vividly remember a teen with whom I debated the morality of the Vagina Monologues tritely respond to me, "Well, I have my truth, and you have your truth, and we can agree to disagree." He was rather proud of his come back, I was distressed. We are all entitled to our opinion, but that I have "my truth" makes it difficult to discover Truth with a capital "T." In a world where reality is merely subjective, it is time to turn to the facts.
My peers and I are comfortable with our reality. We have gay uncles that we love and best friends who've experimented with, well, everything. Our pastors have been dragged away because of the sexual abuse scandals, but at least we were never hit by nuns with rulers--we're lucky if we've ever seen a nun in the flesh. We want to be committed to something, just not forever. At least, that is the trend. This is our reality.
Embracing the term "Odyssey Years," few of us take a stable job after graduating from university. We'd much rather float around the globe, Kerouac style...and experience as many other realities as possible. What makes us unique is that we want to serve. Even if we are confused, we have been imbued with a deep thirst for social justice.
Somewhere in the midst of all that, I happened on a little island off the coast of Portugal. Thousands of miles away others like me happened in Michigan and Illinois, Missouri and Massachusetts, New York and California. We were raised by not-so-perfect families, but we were raised with the best of intentions.
I am a bit of a fluke for my generation. Not only did mom home school me, I was also raised in the Tridentine Latin Mass. I wore a mantilla until I turned 18, at which point I began to attend Jesuit Masses--which were wildly different from my childhood experience of Liturgy. What stayed the same was the witness I saw around me. I was still surrounded by men and women on their knees, praying to the God that "may be." They trusted in a reality that could not be held, and somehow lived lives that pointed to God.
As my collegiate journey continued, I began to realize how unsatisfied I was. I was disappointed by campus culture, and even more so by lack of reference point. Everybody wanted to change the world, but nobody seemed to care if there was consensus on how this could be achieved. It was an endless witness of talking heads, talking, talking, talking...but what where they doing?
I had to ask myself, what was I doing? I was living the cute Catholic girl status quo. Everybody loved me, I did my little pro-life thing but I didn't impose my ideas on others. I didn't speak out about our lack of reference point, or expose how as a Catholic campus, we seemed to be embarrassed by the reality of the God we claimed to be Jesus Christ. I was living a choice, but not the choice that would best be a case for God.
Then I became an upper classman and my reality imploded. I could no longer play it safe. I had a deep desire to make a more radical choice. My peers and I began spending endless hours engaging the administration "Why?" so many things happened on campus that were contrary to our concept of Catholicism. This was the standard response: "What do you want to do about the problem?"
What did we do? We got on our knees then got to our feet. We started an underground Catholic newspaper and fought condom distribution and the Vagina Monologues. We met regularly in the "upper room", as my apartment became known, and built community around meals and our faith in the God that nobody seemed to acknowledge. We stood around statues of Mary and prayed the Rosary in public. We kept fighting for God, and kept up our strength with midnight trips to an urban Adoration Chapel, where we found that God to be very real and very intimate.
The phrase "Urban Saints" became popular among us. Looking back on those years, it is clear to me that we were trying as best we could to live a case for God. We had a clear understanding that all of our choices would make or break us. We couldn't stand and pray in public on Wednesday morning and hook-up all weekend.(confusing sentence) Our lives were a constant struggle for consistency. All we could stand upon in public were our actions. In our hearts, we knew better, though. We knew our foundation was that time on our knees.
As much as college was a time of action, it was also a time of discovery. I became more and more comfortable with who I was, but constantly questioned why I was here. I could only be a college student so long, and the sanctuary of our little campus chapel wouldn't last forever. What kind of choice could I make that would bring peace?
Following suit with the "odyssey years", our experiment with the Catholic newspaper launched a documentary project right after graduation. Strapped with backpacks and a mini-DV camera, my friend T.J. and I pilgrimaged to Europe to explore what that man Karol Wojtyla (who would become John Paul II) was all about. Both of us, and so many of our colleagues, had a strong attachment to Pope John Paul, considering this celibate man a spiritual father. We were particularly captivated by his understanding of human sexuality, and his constant affirmation that God needed us, that we had an irreplaceable role to play.
As the two of us pilgrimaged through Austria, Poland and Italy in an attempt to understand John Paul and the God he so passionately abandoned himself to, things began to happen. I had a deep sense not only of the reality of God, but even more that God knew me, and He was choosing to need me. This wasn't an isolated incident, but rather a recurring theme in my young adult life. In Europe, it hit in a unique way.
In the spirit of contradiction, the place I most sensed the reality of God was Auschwitz. As I stood in the starvation bunker where St. Maximilian Maria Kolbe died for a fellow prisoner, all I could think was, "this was a man who started printing presses, journeyed to Japan and created a movement in Poland attracting thousands to God, this was a man who loved this God so much that he was willing to lay down his very life." I saw the water stained corner where he was injected with carbolic acid because he wouldn't starve to death fast enough for the Nazis. As I heard the story that he died singing the praises of that God he had dedicated his existence to, I was left speechless. He lived a choice to point to God.
I've been told stories of martyrs--men and women who died rather than reject faith in the God they knew to be--since I was a small child. I even wanted to be a martyr, actually, I was fascinated with being a virgin martyr. But, to see the reality of martyrdom in a place so full of evil as Auschwitz was an event not easily replicated. Maximilian was a man who could have done anything, and yet, what did he do? He laid down his life for his brother, in a spirit of radical love that could only be inspired by something far greater than the self.
I'll admit, when I got back from Europe, I doubted my entire existence. How could I be? What in God's name could I do that was worth anything? So many others so much greater than I had gone before me. It took a hard look in the mirror to be shaken out of this doubt, and begin to let the graces of that journey seep into the marrow of my bones. But what choice ought I to live?
Deep down inside, we've all been imbued with a sense that there is something extraordinary out there that we must do. Sadly, many of us stop short in our quest to find the answer to our deepest question, "Why am I here?" In the midst of war, poverty and violence, we are thrown into a rather bleak reality that requires something mystical to make sense of it all. If there is a choice to be made, we have to reconcile the reality of suffering.
I remember bouncing ideas about suffering around in a theology class, reading from the Jewish philosopher Simone Weil. Her perception of suffering is that it must be redemptive, otherwise it could only be evil. As my friends and I pondered the reality of the Crucifixion we'd heard about since Sunday school, bolstered by theologians and mystics like John Paull II, Hans Urs Von Balthasar, St. Edith Stein and Adrinne Von Speyr, things began to congeal.
The more I read from this contemporary group of theologians, the more reality began to make sense. I thought about the Cross. Intellectually, I knew what Catholic Theology taught: that through Christ's suffering and death on the cross, He brought about Redemption for mankind, who had been in a fallen state since the sin of the apple in the Garden of Eden. Yet, there was a difference between intellectually grasping this and actually believing it in my heart.
The more challenging life became, the more I felt drawn to Mass and Adoration. I remember spending hours in the Adoration Chapel just crying, not out of sadness, but rather through accepting that my head and my heart were slowly becoming integrated. What I believed intellectually was actually internalized in the deepest core of who I was as a person.
Slowly the world around me began to reflect the deepest longings in my heart. I began to "see" God in others, and soon I became witness to radical choices. Young men I knew began to enter Seminary. I began to meet young women who were preparing to enter religious life--and then I became one of those women! It seemed like all of us shared a sense of peace in this discernment, but also a sense of urgency. If I could truly do anything and be anyone, what did this conviction about religious life mean?
Great apologists--defenders of the Catholic faith--have argued a case for God. In contemporary society, though, words don't work. We can't make that argument in a world where everyone has their own truth. No matter how eloquently we may learn to speak, we must become scholars in the language of the heart. The heart only learns through experience, and is only converted through a witness to love.
What is love? It is a perfect reflection of God. It is seeking the good of the other, as other. It is a noble desire for the ultimate good of my neighbor, with no strings attached. In essence, it is a selfless love, a love this world is starving for. In my heart I know we are all called to love this way, we are all called to abandon the culture of use that objectifies the other at every turn. My task is to choose a life in which I can love best, and I beleive I can best live a case for God by choosing celibate life as a religious sister.
There will always be a hunger for human affection. I am a person, not an angel. A vocation to religious life or the priesthood requires a unique courage and sacrifice, and I do not pretend to have acquired such virtue, but I am learning. Every reality of the human experience must be sanctified in order to be a witness to love, especially human sexuality. In this quest to integrate who I am as a women into a life of love and service, I am discovering deep joy.
What can this witness say to a world that is saturated by sex and self-satisfaction? How will people perceive a successful young women leaving all that she has to answer that call, "Come, follow me?" Maybe some will think I'm crazy, but in this world of relativism, at least they'll let me have my truth. In that concession, the world may not realize they have accepted my choice, which is essentially my case for God.
In the current adaptation of C.S. Lewis' "Prince Caspian", Dr. Cornelius says to Caspian, "You have the potential to become the most noble contradiction in history..." In a world where everyone has words, our deeds will be the measure of our lives. The question is, do we have the courage to be that noble contradiction? Are we willing to let go of the things that do not last, to seek first the Kingdom...and let our lives be a case for God?
Lent 2009: Day 12
It seems things are congealing...in ways I never imagined. I've been poking around all my 'vocation stuff' and found this essay I submitted to a contest last year. Let me know what you think; I never heard back from the publisher.
+++++++
Noble Contradiction
A Case for God
A Case for God
For thousands of years, people like Aquinas and Augustine have eloquently made a case for God. There is something to be said for words--they inspire and instruct, and at times deeply influence society. Yet, today words cannot win the case for God--only a choice to live a case for God will hold in the court of popular culture. I'll admit that this is not easy choice to make. As a 20-something, I've been told all my life that I can do anything, go anywhere, be whatever I want. So, what would motivate me to live a life that could point to God?
I've seen the fruit of freedom and relativism first hand. I vividly remember a teen with whom I debated the morality of the Vagina Monologues tritely respond to me, "Well, I have my truth, and you have your truth, and we can agree to disagree." He was rather proud of his come back, I was distressed. We are all entitled to our opinion, but that I have "my truth" makes it difficult to discover Truth with a capital "T." In a world where reality is merely subjective, it is time to turn to the facts.
My peers and I are comfortable with our reality. We have gay uncles that we love and best friends who've experimented with, well, everything. Our pastors have been dragged away because of the sexual abuse scandals, but at least we were never hit by nuns with rulers--we're lucky if we've ever seen a nun in the flesh. We want to be committed to something, just not forever. At least, that is the trend. This is our reality.
Embracing the term "Odyssey Years," few of us take a stable job after graduating from university. We'd much rather float around the globe, Kerouac style...and experience as many other realities as possible. What makes us unique is that we want to serve. Even if we are confused, we have been imbued with a deep thirst for social justice.
Somewhere in the midst of all that, I happened on a little island off the coast of Portugal. Thousands of miles away others like me happened in Michigan and Illinois, Missouri and Massachusetts, New York and California. We were raised by not-so-perfect families, but we were raised with the best of intentions.
I am a bit of a fluke for my generation. Not only did mom home school me, I was also raised in the Tridentine Latin Mass. I wore a mantilla until I turned 18, at which point I began to attend Jesuit Masses--which were wildly different from my childhood experience of Liturgy. What stayed the same was the witness I saw around me. I was still surrounded by men and women on their knees, praying to the God that "may be." They trusted in a reality that could not be held, and somehow lived lives that pointed to God.
As my collegiate journey continued, I began to realize how unsatisfied I was. I was disappointed by campus culture, and even more so by lack of reference point. Everybody wanted to change the world, but nobody seemed to care if there was consensus on how this could be achieved. It was an endless witness of talking heads, talking, talking, talking...but what where they doing?
I had to ask myself, what was I doing? I was living the cute Catholic girl status quo. Everybody loved me, I did my little pro-life thing but I didn't impose my ideas on others. I didn't speak out about our lack of reference point, or expose how as a Catholic campus, we seemed to be embarrassed by the reality of the God we claimed to be Jesus Christ. I was living a choice, but not the choice that would best be a case for God.
Then I became an upper classman and my reality imploded. I could no longer play it safe. I had a deep desire to make a more radical choice. My peers and I began spending endless hours engaging the administration "Why?" so many things happened on campus that were contrary to our concept of Catholicism. This was the standard response: "What do you want to do about the problem?"
What did we do? We got on our knees then got to our feet. We started an underground Catholic newspaper and fought condom distribution and the Vagina Monologues. We met regularly in the "upper room", as my apartment became known, and built community around meals and our faith in the God that nobody seemed to acknowledge. We stood around statues of Mary and prayed the Rosary in public. We kept fighting for God, and kept up our strength with midnight trips to an urban Adoration Chapel, where we found that God to be very real and very intimate.
The phrase "Urban Saints" became popular among us. Looking back on those years, it is clear to me that we were trying as best we could to live a case for God. We had a clear understanding that all of our choices would make or break us. We couldn't stand and pray in public on Wednesday morning and hook-up all weekend.(confusing sentence) Our lives were a constant struggle for consistency. All we could stand upon in public were our actions. In our hearts, we knew better, though. We knew our foundation was that time on our knees.
As much as college was a time of action, it was also a time of discovery. I became more and more comfortable with who I was, but constantly questioned why I was here. I could only be a college student so long, and the sanctuary of our little campus chapel wouldn't last forever. What kind of choice could I make that would bring peace?
Following suit with the "odyssey years", our experiment with the Catholic newspaper launched a documentary project right after graduation. Strapped with backpacks and a mini-DV camera, my friend T.J. and I pilgrimaged to Europe to explore what that man Karol Wojtyla (who would become John Paul II) was all about. Both of us, and so many of our colleagues, had a strong attachment to Pope John Paul, considering this celibate man a spiritual father. We were particularly captivated by his understanding of human sexuality, and his constant affirmation that God needed us, that we had an irreplaceable role to play.
As the two of us pilgrimaged through Austria, Poland and Italy in an attempt to understand John Paul and the God he so passionately abandoned himself to, things began to happen. I had a deep sense not only of the reality of God, but even more that God knew me, and He was choosing to need me. This wasn't an isolated incident, but rather a recurring theme in my young adult life. In Europe, it hit in a unique way.
In the spirit of contradiction, the place I most sensed the reality of God was Auschwitz. As I stood in the starvation bunker where St. Maximilian Maria Kolbe died for a fellow prisoner, all I could think was, "this was a man who started printing presses, journeyed to Japan and created a movement in Poland attracting thousands to God, this was a man who loved this God so much that he was willing to lay down his very life." I saw the water stained corner where he was injected with carbolic acid because he wouldn't starve to death fast enough for the Nazis. As I heard the story that he died singing the praises of that God he had dedicated his existence to, I was left speechless. He lived a choice to point to God.
I've been told stories of martyrs--men and women who died rather than reject faith in the God they knew to be--since I was a small child. I even wanted to be a martyr, actually, I was fascinated with being a virgin martyr. But, to see the reality of martyrdom in a place so full of evil as Auschwitz was an event not easily replicated. Maximilian was a man who could have done anything, and yet, what did he do? He laid down his life for his brother, in a spirit of radical love that could only be inspired by something far greater than the self.
I'll admit, when I got back from Europe, I doubted my entire existence. How could I be? What in God's name could I do that was worth anything? So many others so much greater than I had gone before me. It took a hard look in the mirror to be shaken out of this doubt, and begin to let the graces of that journey seep into the marrow of my bones. But what choice ought I to live?
Deep down inside, we've all been imbued with a sense that there is something extraordinary out there that we must do. Sadly, many of us stop short in our quest to find the answer to our deepest question, "Why am I here?" In the midst of war, poverty and violence, we are thrown into a rather bleak reality that requires something mystical to make sense of it all. If there is a choice to be made, we have to reconcile the reality of suffering.
I remember bouncing ideas about suffering around in a theology class, reading from the Jewish philosopher Simone Weil. Her perception of suffering is that it must be redemptive, otherwise it could only be evil. As my friends and I pondered the reality of the Crucifixion we'd heard about since Sunday school, bolstered by theologians and mystics like John Paull II, Hans Urs Von Balthasar, St. Edith Stein and Adrinne Von Speyr, things began to congeal.
The more I read from this contemporary group of theologians, the more reality began to make sense. I thought about the Cross. Intellectually, I knew what Catholic Theology taught: that through Christ's suffering and death on the cross, He brought about Redemption for mankind, who had been in a fallen state since the sin of the apple in the Garden of Eden. Yet, there was a difference between intellectually grasping this and actually believing it in my heart.
The more challenging life became, the more I felt drawn to Mass and Adoration. I remember spending hours in the Adoration Chapel just crying, not out of sadness, but rather through accepting that my head and my heart were slowly becoming integrated. What I believed intellectually was actually internalized in the deepest core of who I was as a person.
Slowly the world around me began to reflect the deepest longings in my heart. I began to "see" God in others, and soon I became witness to radical choices. Young men I knew began to enter Seminary. I began to meet young women who were preparing to enter religious life--and then I became one of those women! It seemed like all of us shared a sense of peace in this discernment, but also a sense of urgency. If I could truly do anything and be anyone, what did this conviction about religious life mean?
Great apologists--defenders of the Catholic faith--have argued a case for God. In contemporary society, though, words don't work. We can't make that argument in a world where everyone has their own truth. No matter how eloquently we may learn to speak, we must become scholars in the language of the heart. The heart only learns through experience, and is only converted through a witness to love.
What is love? It is a perfect reflection of God. It is seeking the good of the other, as other. It is a noble desire for the ultimate good of my neighbor, with no strings attached. In essence, it is a selfless love, a love this world is starving for. In my heart I know we are all called to love this way, we are all called to abandon the culture of use that objectifies the other at every turn. My task is to choose a life in which I can love best, and I beleive I can best live a case for God by choosing celibate life as a religious sister.
There will always be a hunger for human affection. I am a person, not an angel. A vocation to religious life or the priesthood requires a unique courage and sacrifice, and I do not pretend to have acquired such virtue, but I am learning. Every reality of the human experience must be sanctified in order to be a witness to love, especially human sexuality. In this quest to integrate who I am as a women into a life of love and service, I am discovering deep joy.
What can this witness say to a world that is saturated by sex and self-satisfaction? How will people perceive a successful young women leaving all that she has to answer that call, "Come, follow me?" Maybe some will think I'm crazy, but in this world of relativism, at least they'll let me have my truth. In that concession, the world may not realize they have accepted my choice, which is essentially my case for God.
In the current adaptation of C.S. Lewis' "Prince Caspian", Dr. Cornelius says to Caspian, "You have the potential to become the most noble contradiction in history..." In a world where everyone has words, our deeds will be the measure of our lives. The question is, do we have the courage to be that noble contradiction? Are we willing to let go of the things that do not last, to seek first the Kingdom...and let our lives be a case for God?
Saturday, March 7, 2009
Can you not watch with Me?
+JMJ+
Lent 2009: Day 11
Getting back to some of my favorite theologians, I grabbed Von Balthasar's "Threefold Garland" on my way out yesterday. I wanted to make a special Holy Hour at 3:00 p.m...for First Friday, Divine Mercy and Lent.
To help prep, I read VB's meditation on the First Sorrowful Mystery--the Agony of Jesus in the Garden. It is often discussed by mystics and theologians how Jesus literally sweat blood in the Garden, this truly was the beginning of his Passion. Not only does Balthasar point this out, but another reflection of his really hits home.
He recalls how Jesus 'takes a break', as it were, from his Passion to check up on his Apostles, to see if they are still waiting and watching with Him. What does He find? His three closest companions asleep at their post.
Balthasar reflects how these three represent those whom the Lord is couting on most in His mission in the world: the Priests and Consecrated Religious. Ah! And how often do they fall asleep at the post, how often are they not vigilant. And when those to whom the Lord entusts with much sleep...what pain the Mystical Body undergoes.
As I entered into the three o'clock hour, I prayed the Divine Mercy Chaplet, and then meditated upon the Seven Sorrows of Our Lady in the form of the Rosary (instead of 5 traditional decades per Rosary, meditate upon the Seven Sorrows of Mary as 7 mysteries). This way of meditating on the Rosary began in Kibeho, Rwanda. It is a deeply intense meditation! Throughout, I kept coming back to that thought of Balthasar...and wondered, will I stay Faithful to Jesus, to serving His little ones, when, God-willing, I become a consecrated religious?
I keep hearing it said that Religious and Priests are the leaven...and without that leaven, the Mystical Body suffers. And again, the Body suffers when the leaven is defficient, when the leaven works contrary to its purpose. The celibate vocation points to the ultimate purpose of our existance: perfect union with God in Heaven.
But what if they sleep? To what does that point? What if they rebel? Does that lead the little ones to Heaven?
In this time of Lent, may we all committ to the renwal of our minds and hearts...and realize that every choice has an outcome that will either build the Faithful, or stir up doubts and lead many astray.
Lent 2009: Day 11
Getting back to some of my favorite theologians, I grabbed Von Balthasar's "Threefold Garland" on my way out yesterday. I wanted to make a special Holy Hour at 3:00 p.m...for First Friday, Divine Mercy and Lent.
To help prep, I read VB's meditation on the First Sorrowful Mystery--the Agony of Jesus in the Garden. It is often discussed by mystics and theologians how Jesus literally sweat blood in the Garden, this truly was the beginning of his Passion. Not only does Balthasar point this out, but another reflection of his really hits home.
He recalls how Jesus 'takes a break', as it were, from his Passion to check up on his Apostles, to see if they are still waiting and watching with Him. What does He find? His three closest companions asleep at their post.
Balthasar reflects how these three represent those whom the Lord is couting on most in His mission in the world: the Priests and Consecrated Religious. Ah! And how often do they fall asleep at the post, how often are they not vigilant. And when those to whom the Lord entusts with much sleep...what pain the Mystical Body undergoes.
As I entered into the three o'clock hour, I prayed the Divine Mercy Chaplet, and then meditated upon the Seven Sorrows of Our Lady in the form of the Rosary (instead of 5 traditional decades per Rosary, meditate upon the Seven Sorrows of Mary as 7 mysteries). This way of meditating on the Rosary began in Kibeho, Rwanda. It is a deeply intense meditation! Throughout, I kept coming back to that thought of Balthasar...and wondered, will I stay Faithful to Jesus, to serving His little ones, when, God-willing, I become a consecrated religious?
I keep hearing it said that Religious and Priests are the leaven...and without that leaven, the Mystical Body suffers. And again, the Body suffers when the leaven is defficient, when the leaven works contrary to its purpose. The celibate vocation points to the ultimate purpose of our existance: perfect union with God in Heaven.
But what if they sleep? To what does that point? What if they rebel? Does that lead the little ones to Heaven?
In this time of Lent, may we all committ to the renwal of our minds and hearts...and realize that every choice has an outcome that will either build the Faithful, or stir up doubts and lead many astray.
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Complete Consumption
+JMJ+
Lent 2009: Day 9
It is a paraphrase, but St. Augustine wrote something along those lines in his famous "Late have I loved Thee" passage.
After this weekend, I have been feeling an intense yearning to be with the Jesus. I find that in the diverse situations I've been placed since the close of Bread of Life, nowhere am I "home."
Yesterday I spent lobbying Illinois State Reps against HB 2354, which is essentially Illinois' very own version of FOCA. If you've ever lobbied, you know how intense it can be. Myself and Rep. Sandy Cole really got into it over HB 2354. Cole, a member of Catholics for a Free Choice, adamantly disagreed with my concern for the Bill...and she made sure she told me that after having met with me, she would definitely vote FOR HB 2354. That really was a stab in the chest.
The redeeming part of the Lobbying Day (beyond being in solidarity with thousands of Catholics, as it was our official Catholics at the Capitol Day) was the prayer. On our way to and from Springfield, we prayed on the bus. I was blessed to lead the prayer...and particularly on our drive back, during the Hour of Great Mercy, prayer was so edifying. We meditated on the Seven Sorrows of Our Lady and the Divine Mercy Chaplet. It was a respite in the midst of the chaos that is the IL State Government.
Tonight I was once again at Catholic Underground. Adoration always begins the evening...and I just had no desire to leave the Chapel when it was over...
My heart is restless. What more can I say. It isn't "just" about my experience at Bread of Life. Years of knowing, bit by bit, just a little more about God's love for me has contributed to this insatiable thirst that I now have for Him. There is nothing that can satisfy me in this world...I cannot be complete until I am totally His.
To be filled with God, and then in turn to share that abundant life, to allow Christ's light to shine through me: this is what I desire. I cannot be afraid. Men and women are suffering for love--who will be the face of Christ to them? All of us must...but if God is inviting you or I to Radically live out our Baptismal promises through a celibate vocation, we must respond with the same generosity that God extends to us...otherwise we can never be complete.
Lent 2009: Day 9
"I have tasted you...and now I yearn for you..."
It is a paraphrase, but St. Augustine wrote something along those lines in his famous "Late have I loved Thee" passage.
After this weekend, I have been feeling an intense yearning to be with the Jesus. I find that in the diverse situations I've been placed since the close of Bread of Life, nowhere am I "home."
Yesterday I spent lobbying Illinois State Reps against HB 2354, which is essentially Illinois' very own version of FOCA. If you've ever lobbied, you know how intense it can be. Myself and Rep. Sandy Cole really got into it over HB 2354. Cole, a member of Catholics for a Free Choice, adamantly disagreed with my concern for the Bill...and she made sure she told me that after having met with me, she would definitely vote FOR HB 2354. That really was a stab in the chest.
The redeeming part of the Lobbying Day (beyond being in solidarity with thousands of Catholics, as it was our official Catholics at the Capitol Day) was the prayer. On our way to and from Springfield, we prayed on the bus. I was blessed to lead the prayer...and particularly on our drive back, during the Hour of Great Mercy, prayer was so edifying. We meditated on the Seven Sorrows of Our Lady and the Divine Mercy Chaplet. It was a respite in the midst of the chaos that is the IL State Government.
Tonight I was once again at Catholic Underground. Adoration always begins the evening...and I just had no desire to leave the Chapel when it was over...
My heart is restless. What more can I say. It isn't "just" about my experience at Bread of Life. Years of knowing, bit by bit, just a little more about God's love for me has contributed to this insatiable thirst that I now have for Him. There is nothing that can satisfy me in this world...I cannot be complete until I am totally His.
To be filled with God, and then in turn to share that abundant life, to allow Christ's light to shine through me: this is what I desire. I cannot be afraid. Men and women are suffering for love--who will be the face of Christ to them? All of us must...but if God is inviting you or I to Radically live out our Baptismal promises through a celibate vocation, we must respond with the same generosity that God extends to us...otherwise we can never be complete.
"My heart is restless untill I rest in thee..."
Monday, March 2, 2009
Made to Love
+JMJ+
Lent 2009: Day 6
Perhaps one way to approach discernment is by allowing God to reveal to you how you were best created to love. Today as I read this passage from St. Paul, which is the reading for Vespers, I couldn't help but think of my own desire to offer my body entirely to God as a true living sacrifice. Yes, I am not perfect, but all God desires is my choice...my choosing Him. He can work with that, even in my imperfection.
This weekend at the Bread of Life Retreat, Bobby Kruger, a Chicago Seminarian, gave a witness talk about his vocation/discernment. At the end he talked a little about how he has discovered what spiritual fatherhood means...and that he knows the way he was created to love would be limited in the married vocation. Yes, marriage is beautiful, as is family life...but for some, God creates them to love in such a way that they would be limited in married life. Their love is so big, so all encompassing that it desires to reach out and draw all people into relationship with God...to be true "fishers of men."
Bobby's witness was so clear to me. As I continue this adventure, this constant challenge of saying Fiat every day, I learn more and more about how I was created to love. Yes, I do not deny that I am attracted to men or that family life is a beautiful thing and that I could see myself with many children...but I know that I could never be complete in that. There is something deep inside of me that cannot love in an exclusive way. I grow to understand daily that in giving myself fully to God, in becoming completely His, in focusing myself entirely on Him...I will be free to love as God is inviting me to love...as I set myself upon God, my life will be concerned "with the things of the Lord."
This, I beleive, is the renewal of the mind that St. Paul speaks of: allowing the scales to fall away so that we can see clearly for what we were created. No matter what one is being called to, God is calling us to constant conversion, constant renewal. Conforming to culture does not create saints. St. Paul says that if we say fiat to the renewal of our minds then we will truly be able to discern, to judge what is God's will: that which is good, pleasing and perfect.
Good
Pleasing
Perfect
That, in a nutshell, is what your vocation is in the eyes of God. Each of us have a unique journey, but all of us are called to a particular state in life. It is so easy to get caught up in the drama of 'pleasing God,' of discovering that perfect thing that in the Divine economy of salvation might save the most souls...ah, but what a trap!! We cannot witness fully if we are not complete in Christ. I am not in any way detracting from anyone's Christian witness, but I am affirming that if we sincerely desire to witness the way that we have been uniquely created to do so...we must commit ourselves to constant renewal, so that we can honestly discern God's holy will for our lives.
What is vocation, then? It is all about how God created you to love. It is truly that simple. Only we make it complicated. Pray for courage, commit to that renewal...and you will begin to see clearly what is good, pleasing...and perfect.
Lent 2009: Day 6
"Brothers, I beg you through the mercy of God to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice holy and acceptable to God, your spiritual worship. Do not conform yourselves to this age but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, so that you may judge what is God's will, what is good, pleasing and perfect."
~ Romans 12: 1-2
Perhaps one way to approach discernment is by allowing God to reveal to you how you were best created to love. Today as I read this passage from St. Paul, which is the reading for Vespers, I couldn't help but think of my own desire to offer my body entirely to God as a true living sacrifice. Yes, I am not perfect, but all God desires is my choice...my choosing Him. He can work with that, even in my imperfection.
This weekend at the Bread of Life Retreat, Bobby Kruger, a Chicago Seminarian, gave a witness talk about his vocation/discernment. At the end he talked a little about how he has discovered what spiritual fatherhood means...and that he knows the way he was created to love would be limited in the married vocation. Yes, marriage is beautiful, as is family life...but for some, God creates them to love in such a way that they would be limited in married life. Their love is so big, so all encompassing that it desires to reach out and draw all people into relationship with God...to be true "fishers of men."
Bobby's witness was so clear to me. As I continue this adventure, this constant challenge of saying Fiat every day, I learn more and more about how I was created to love. Yes, I do not deny that I am attracted to men or that family life is a beautiful thing and that I could see myself with many children...but I know that I could never be complete in that. There is something deep inside of me that cannot love in an exclusive way. I grow to understand daily that in giving myself fully to God, in becoming completely His, in focusing myself entirely on Him...I will be free to love as God is inviting me to love...as I set myself upon God, my life will be concerned "with the things of the Lord."
This, I beleive, is the renewal of the mind that St. Paul speaks of: allowing the scales to fall away so that we can see clearly for what we were created. No matter what one is being called to, God is calling us to constant conversion, constant renewal. Conforming to culture does not create saints. St. Paul says that if we say fiat to the renewal of our minds then we will truly be able to discern, to judge what is God's will: that which is good, pleasing and perfect.
Good
Pleasing
Perfect
That, in a nutshell, is what your vocation is in the eyes of God. Each of us have a unique journey, but all of us are called to a particular state in life. It is so easy to get caught up in the drama of 'pleasing God,' of discovering that perfect thing that in the Divine economy of salvation might save the most souls...ah, but what a trap!! We cannot witness fully if we are not complete in Christ. I am not in any way detracting from anyone's Christian witness, but I am affirming that if we sincerely desire to witness the way that we have been uniquely created to do so...we must commit ourselves to constant renewal, so that we can honestly discern God's holy will for our lives.
What is vocation, then? It is all about how God created you to love. It is truly that simple. Only we make it complicated. Pray for courage, commit to that renewal...and you will begin to see clearly what is good, pleasing...and perfect.
Sunday, March 1, 2009
Christ is Alive
+JMJ+
Lent 2009: Day 5
350 Teens.
3 Days
1 High School Gym.
Jesus Christ, present, Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity...
...Lives Changed Forever.
Perhaps you are a little down. You think the Church is not strong, the young people don't care...and that there is little, if anything, to hope in. I am here to tell you, do not despair! This weekend, in Chicago (just as in it happens around the globe) the Youth 2000 Retreat invited young people to have a personal, intimate encounter with Jesus Christ in the Eucharist...and illuminated the treasures of the Catholic Church--and the truth about life.
While this year we called our retreat Bread of Life (because we are using a local retreat team vs. the national team), it was true to the Youth 200 model to a "T".
I knew as the teens started to fill the gym on Friday night, there would be walls broken down, hearts open and tears shed: as the retreat progressed, my intuition was confirmed.
Unlike last year, Meditation and Eucharistic Adoration had a distinct impact on the youth Friday evening...leading into a more centered group when they came back Saturday morning. With over 350 teens, you can imagine there is a science to keeping the retreat focused (not to mention curtail cell phone use, talking and extended bathroom 'breaks')...but through the intercession of Our Lady of Guadalupe (Patroness of the retreat) and the power of the Holy Spirit, little by little, minute by minute, hearts were more and more open to the Grace and Love of God.
Jesus Christ was truly present in the Eucharist, exposed in the Monstrance upon the pillar of candles we call the Burning Bush. Truly, He is the Retreat Master--how can one refuse the Love of Christ Himself? He invited many holy priests, religious and lay people to be His instruments of love and mercy. Through witnesses and talks seeds were planted, all in the presence of Christ. In the silence, He spoke to every heart present. Even those who would not listen heard...and we pray that those things whispered in the silence will remain with them, that they might truly listen to the message of His love for them.
There were a few times throughout the weekend when my own vocation was strengthened. I continue to feel a deep longing to be in religious life, sometimes so deep that it is painful--I desire it so greatly! This weekend I experienced that a few times: not during the times when you are "supposed to feel it" but rather in the silence...when there were just a few people in our gym Chapel...and I was there before Jesus, feeling His love and just desiring to be His, and to be an instrument of Love for His children. A while back I told God that I just want to be Joy...as He is Love, I desire so deeply to be Joy. I felt that confirmed this weekend.
If only you could have seen the young people dancing and singing...or if you could have sat in on some of the small groups and heard them ask honest questions and share deep faith...if you could have seen the smiles on their faces as they left...and even sensed the seed planted among the most challenging teens, you would know there is hope. Our Hope is Jesus Christ. He comes among His people, He walks among us just as He walked among the those at Bread of Life Saturday evening, when we had our Eucharistic Procession, when we were each invited to reach out to receive Jesus' healing and love.
Christ is alive, and truly He reigns. He wants nothing more than all of us, so that He can give us that life He talks about...that life that is abundant. If we don't answer His call, we'll miss the greatest adventure we could ever experience.
Please pray for the young people and all involved in Bread of Life this weekend in Chicago. Many brave young men and women publicly witnessed to their sense that God is calling them to Religious Life and the Priesthood. Pray for them...as the Enemy will surly try to discourage them these next few weeks and months.
Praise be Jesus Christ...Now and Forever!
Lent 2009: Day 5
"What I liked most about the retreat: Goodness Gracious! Having the Blessed Sacrament right there for nearly the entire retreat was just phenomenal...on this retreat I really felt a distinct and solid call (to the priesthood)."
~ 17 year old male participant's witness at the end of Bread of Life
350 Teens.
3 Days
1 High School Gym.
Jesus Christ, present, Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity...
...Lives Changed Forever.
Perhaps you are a little down. You think the Church is not strong, the young people don't care...and that there is little, if anything, to hope in. I am here to tell you, do not despair! This weekend, in Chicago (just as in it happens around the globe) the Youth 2000 Retreat invited young people to have a personal, intimate encounter with Jesus Christ in the Eucharist...and illuminated the treasures of the Catholic Church--and the truth about life.
While this year we called our retreat Bread of Life (because we are using a local retreat team vs. the national team), it was true to the Youth 200 model to a "T".
I knew as the teens started to fill the gym on Friday night, there would be walls broken down, hearts open and tears shed: as the retreat progressed, my intuition was confirmed.
Unlike last year, Meditation and Eucharistic Adoration had a distinct impact on the youth Friday evening...leading into a more centered group when they came back Saturday morning. With over 350 teens, you can imagine there is a science to keeping the retreat focused (not to mention curtail cell phone use, talking and extended bathroom 'breaks')...but through the intercession of Our Lady of Guadalupe (Patroness of the retreat) and the power of the Holy Spirit, little by little, minute by minute, hearts were more and more open to the Grace and Love of God.
Jesus Christ was truly present in the Eucharist, exposed in the Monstrance upon the pillar of candles we call the Burning Bush. Truly, He is the Retreat Master--how can one refuse the Love of Christ Himself? He invited many holy priests, religious and lay people to be His instruments of love and mercy. Through witnesses and talks seeds were planted, all in the presence of Christ. In the silence, He spoke to every heart present. Even those who would not listen heard...and we pray that those things whispered in the silence will remain with them, that they might truly listen to the message of His love for them.
There were a few times throughout the weekend when my own vocation was strengthened. I continue to feel a deep longing to be in religious life, sometimes so deep that it is painful--I desire it so greatly! This weekend I experienced that a few times: not during the times when you are "supposed to feel it" but rather in the silence...when there were just a few people in our gym Chapel...and I was there before Jesus, feeling His love and just desiring to be His, and to be an instrument of Love for His children. A while back I told God that I just want to be Joy...as He is Love, I desire so deeply to be Joy. I felt that confirmed this weekend.
If only you could have seen the young people dancing and singing...or if you could have sat in on some of the small groups and heard them ask honest questions and share deep faith...if you could have seen the smiles on their faces as they left...and even sensed the seed planted among the most challenging teens, you would know there is hope. Our Hope is Jesus Christ. He comes among His people, He walks among us just as He walked among the those at Bread of Life Saturday evening, when we had our Eucharistic Procession, when we were each invited to reach out to receive Jesus' healing and love.
Christ is alive, and truly He reigns. He wants nothing more than all of us, so that He can give us that life He talks about...that life that is abundant. If we don't answer His call, we'll miss the greatest adventure we could ever experience.
Please pray for the young people and all involved in Bread of Life this weekend in Chicago. Many brave young men and women publicly witnessed to their sense that God is calling them to Religious Life and the Priesthood. Pray for them...as the Enemy will surly try to discourage them these next few weeks and months.
Praise be Jesus Christ...Now and Forever!
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